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If yes to both, skip to where I tell you how to spend less time pecking away at your keyboard and more time getting some e-booty, or a meaningful relationship -- whatever your goal is. "Having a profile online is like having another credit card in your wallet; it's there as backup."It's just another way to meet women. Saying you're funny has no meaning if nothing in your profile makes me laugh. The handsome face I know was in his photo -- but he was holding a baby. It's cloying, and makes a woman wonder whose baby it is.) And his answer to the question "What's your favorite on-screen sex scene? (It was a joke, but the humor didn't translate.) I called him, I advised him. He immediately received messages from five new women.

Be aware: The e-fishing pond is more competitive than ever. Cheese like this gave personals a bad name.* Spelling counts. But when we see misspellings, we think, "How badly does this guy want to meet someone? Or hire someone: At an expert can tune up your profile or write it for you.

They will greatly help you determine which site(s) are best for your needs. "Any guy who's complaining about being single, and who at this late date does not have an online profile as part of his diversified dating portfolio, should stop complaining," says Lynn Harris, a journalist who helps online daters perfect their profiles at Normally I don't recommend props, and normally I'd be suspicious of a show-off. What I won't respond to is a photo of a shirtless man -- even if you're on the beach; even if you have It's like freshman comp:* Show, don't tell. Make sure the photo is taken up close and in focus -- no sunglasses, no hats. One man I went out with had a profile shot of himself at the wheel of a sailboat: superhot.(It's a half-assed message that says my profile caught your eye.) I'm not so crazy about the IM option, either. In the subject line, most guys write "Hi" or "Hey," so at least add my user name.Or write something like "Caring is creepy," because my profile says I like the soundtrack. It doesn't matter much what you say in your message.Make a connection based on something you noticed in my profile.Say that of all the women you saw online, I'm the one who stood out.E-mailing a woman who's in the serious-relationship category when you're listed in intimate encounters is a waste of time -- and, really, it's rude and creepy.Shout-out to the guys who want to "play": No, I will not meet you on the 6 train. Very important: If you're just looking for sex, make sure you're targeting women who are clearly doing the same.On most sites, you can specify whether you're looking for play or intimate encounters, friendship, dating, or a serious relationship.

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