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She has told me and her sister - otherwise, she says, she's '100 per cent certain' that nobody else knows.'I won't allow Mark to call me on my mobile or email me, ever. I insist we talk on our office landlines, and when we meet for drinks or dinner, we pay with cash.

'The biggest difference is that women are much better at keeping their affairs secret,' he says.

When men have affairs, he says, they tend to be bigger risk-takers and naïve about how obvious their cheating is to an emotionally astute partner.

They will also be bursting to tell someone about it. They will often want to brag about it, or be so taken up by the sexual thrill of the affair that their behaviour is a giveaway.' Women, on the other hand, are much more cool and rational, even when they're in the grip of passion. They may confide in one or two very close women friends, but they compartmentalise their emotional lives and don't let the affair bleed into the rest of their lives.' Like Farrah Fawcett, a former colleague of mine, Susan, now 50, had a long-term affair with Brian, a salesman she met, ironically enough, when she was buying her husband a car as a surprise 40th birthday present.

The truth is that we have always lied about our sex lives.

British men consistently claim to have had more partners than women - the current average is 13, while women claim to have had only nine. While men might exaggerate their sexual conquests, the bigger liars are women. In spite of apparent equality and a more sexually open society, we are still more harshly judged for our sex lives than men.

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